Tales of Strength and Resilience: Ep 2 with Lucy Mwakaba

“Tales of Strength and Resilience” podcast explores the boundless dimensions of strength and resilience. Join the host, Muthoni Waigwa, on a transformative journey as we delve into the very essence of these profound qualities. We will unveil the multifaceted nature of strength and resilience in heartfelt conversations with extraordinary individuals. 

Challenges come at different stages of our lives; offering different lessons that we can learn from. One challenge that we face is failure. How can we learn from failure? Listen to this episode to know that failure is not fatal. 

This episode is shared with Lucy Mwakaba who is an Education Professional, a qualified teacher with a BA. in Education from the Kenyatta University. She also has a MSc. in Education Management from Strathmore University. She enjoys teaching and imparting knowledge to both young and old generation and has had the opportunity to do so through various forums which were both formal and informal. 

Lucy is the Co- Founder and Program Manager of The Lead Child, an organization that trains 7 - 18-year- olds in Values, Leadership and Financial Literacy. The Organization’s main objectives are to develop ethical leaders and also spur an entrepreneurial spirit in children and young adults in order to address challenges brought about by a shortage of formal employment. 

 
Finally, Lucy has also worked as a Personal Coach. This she has done through focusing on the individual person and identifying underlying habits that affect their progress in life. She has worked at helping them discover their true value, source of motivation and passion and also the inner drive that would enable make positive shifts in their lives. 

Her belief is that the world becomes a better place when we live our lives selflessly and with an attitude of servant-hood towards our fellow man. 

-----------------
“Tales of Strength and Resilience” podcast explores the boundless dimensions of strength and resilience. Join the host, Muthoni Waigwa, on a transformative journey as we delve into the very essence of these profound qualities. We will unveil the multifaceted nature of strength and resilience in heartfelt conversations with extraordinary individuals. 

About Muthoni Waigwa  
Muthoni Waigwa is a remarkable individual—a visionary leader, an inspiring speaker, and a beacon of motivation. She is the co-founder of Niftyworks Plus Ltd, a dynamic graphic design and audio-visual production company that passionately creates captivating digital content from the unique African perspective. With her unparalleled creativity and entrepreneurial spirit, she also wears the hat of a compassionate host. Through her podcast, "Moments with Nderru," she shares a plethora of captivating stories that uplift and empower her listeners.

Join the Baobab Platform today.

Transcript

Muthoni Waigwa:

Welcome to the Tales of Strength and Resilience podcast, where we explore the boundless dimensions of strength and resilience. Join me, your host, Muthoni Waigwa, on a transformation journey as we delve into the very essence of these profound qualities. We will unveil the multifaceted nature of strength and resilience in heartfelt conversations with extraordinary individuals. We will empower and enlighten through these inspiring stories triumphing over adversity and discovering transformation lessons embedded within. Get ready for today's episode where untold stories of inner power and tenacity await us. Let's begin.

Welcome onto the show, Lucy.

Lucy Mwakaba:

Thank you very much, Muthoni. I'm glad to be here.

Muthoni Waigwa:

So before we dive into the conversation, how are you today and what are you looking forward to at this point in your life?

Lucy Mwakaba:

Oh, wow. It's very chilly, I must say. It's very cold. I don't know. The weather forecast keeps on saying, I don't know, 13 degrees and stuff like that, but it feels like negative something, so it's a bit chilly, but I'm grateful. Started my day to day by going for a walk, struck around just to get my mind moving.

What am I looking forward today? There's some work I need to do where The Lead Child is concerned. That's the organization I co-founded. We are halfway through the year, so penning down what we've been able to achieve and what we are looking forward to achieve in the next half of the year. What are the challenges that we faced? How are we looking forward to going? So that is basically going to be my day.

I also have a parenting forum with two moms later today. So again, looking forward to that conversation. So yes, that's what I'm looking forward to today. Yeah.

Muthoni Waigwa:

So you've mentioned The Lead Child. I can just read a small snippet from your bio. It's an organization that trains 17 to 18 year olds in values, leadership and financial literacy. Why did you see that it was important for this age group of people to learn about values, leadership and financial literacy?

Lucy Mwakaba:

So The Lead Child was... I'm one of the co-founders, but I had a partner who since before Corona, she left so I'm actually running the organization on my own. Now, the reason why we started The Lead Child is because number one, both of us are moms. And so having children in our own space and realizing that in as much as our children are getting the academic prowess, there's a bit of stuff that is lagging. And that is, they're not necessarily, of course CBC is trying to bridge the gap, but they're not necessarily being very proactive in teaching them about financial literacy, about how they can become leaders. So we decided to step into the gap and do that. Do exactly that, and ensure that first of all, our children are a step ahead of where we were at their age. So they get to learn how to become leaders. They get to learn how to have proper values depending on the values that we uphold as a family. And also just getting to know about money matters earlier on.

And we'd have conversation with my co-founder and we'd say, "Imagine if we knew about how to take care of finances when we were younger, even before starting to get children. Imagine how far we would be." And that led to us getting into this business also looking around us and just saying, "The rate of unemployment keeps on rising. What different thing can we do? How can we ensure that by the time our children and other people's children get into the job market, that we are not having the same narrative of joblessness? How can we start inculcating the culture of what can I do with my hands? What has God put in me that I'm able to do that will enable me to make a living?" So those conversations brought about the birth of The Lead Child here.

And the training begins from seven years, not 17, seven years to adulthood. And we even now are engaging parents as well because we discovered that in as much as you, I will teach a seven-year-old, if I don't bring the parent on board, how will they continue this conversation? And this is not a one-off conversation, it is training that goes on for a while. Yeah.

Muthoni Waigwa:

I like that. You know you are instilling with in them values that cannot be taken away from them, and that's also a strength. You're really building in them, strength for them to navigate life. So with that in mind, what does strength mean to you?

Lucy Mwakaba:

Wow. So for me, strength is total dependence and reliance on God. I am a Christian and I believe in God. So for me, relying on God totally is my source of strength. It's also the ability to withstand challenges because sure enough... And you know that you've been in business, you know you are a person who's doing different things... Life will throw you challenges. So being able to withstand those challenges is also a definition of strength. Ability to keep going, even when I face roadblocks. And the most important thing is the courage to ask for help. So just because I'm good at something, just because I'm passionate about what I do does not mean I know everything that there is to know. There's always something to learn. So being in a position where I'm able to ask people for help is also a form of strength. Yeah.

Muthoni Waigwa:

I agree with you. Being able to ask for help, but also I'm learning where you ask for help is also important because sometimes some people you may reach out to them asking for help and they don't live up to that moment. They ignore you. They just leave you on the wayside and tell you, "You know what, figure yourself out."

So would you say that resilience and strength are the same thing and if not, what are your thoughts?

Lucy Mwakaba:

They are very closely related, but not necessarily the same thing. So for me, resilience I believe is the ability to bounce back. You know you've faced a challenge, you've fallen flat on your face, but you're able to collect yourself and stand up again. You're able to withstand situations that for some people it'll be the end of them. It's the ability to keep at it even when all else seems like it's a failure. I think resilience is that.

It's also the ability to adapt. Adapt to changing seasons, and I'll give you an example. I am a mother. I am a mother of three children, two girls and a boy. So my first-born is 13, my second-born is 10, and my last-born is almost three years old. So you can see I'm already in shifting seasons when it comes to parenting. So I have a teen, I have a pre-teen, and I have a toddler now. Now the first two are girls, the last one is a boy. So that, let me tell you, that changes the dynamics of everything. So being able to adapt to the changing seasons in my life, be it as a business person, as a mother, as a wife, as a sister, whichever arena in my life, I think that is resilience.

Muthoni Waigwa:

I like how you've mentioned the different stages of your children and it just reflects the seasons of life you know. You know sometimes we look at someone they're in a harvest season or they're enjoying the fruits of their labor, but for you, you are stuck in this challenge. You don't know how you are going to navigate out of it. So how would you encourage someone who is in that space where they don't know how to be strong, they don't know how to navigate that challenge, but they know that they can, but they just don't have the insights or the tools to do so?

Lucy Mwakaba:

I think the first thing I would say is, it's okay not to know what to do. I mean there are seasons. There are seasons when we are strong, we are so confident in what you're doing. We are so aware. We are so focused. You know the laser sharp focus, there are seasons like that.

But there are seasons where we are you know clueless. You are like you're parenting a teen for example, and you're thinking, "Oh my goodness, what am I going to do in this scenario? I mean, this is my child, but I feel like the way they're going is so off." So it's okay. Number one, it's very okay for you to not know.

Now, I totally believe that you cannot journey in this life alone. So who is your support system? That's what I would ask. Who are the people who are around you who not only love you, but they care about you deeply to want to help you? So in seasons like that, please look out for your support system and lean on them. And of course be honest. Honest and open enough to say, "You know what? I'm in this season and I honestly don't know what to do. I mean, I feel like I need a breather. Can I just take time off?" And hopefully you're in a position where you're able to do that. So number one, just look for your support system and lean on them.

And then you can also be a source of encouragement to someone through the words that you speak to them. Just words of encouragement and your actions if somebody is needing you know. And not necessarily to propagate the idea of giving someone a fish as opposed to showing them how to fish but there are moments when you're required to actually help someone and help them out financially.

Now I think one of the things that I've learned is moving away from labeling people based on what they do or what they have accomplished. We are so fond of that to the point where people who are in a place or in a space where they're lost, they feel like, "Now where do I turn? Everyone looks as if they're making it. Where do I turn to?" If we get to a place as human beings where we can just honestly look to at people like who they are as human beings, that who you can have your ups, you can have your downs and it's fine.

So for me, those are the three things I would think of when it comes to encouraging someone who's feeling like, "Oh my goodness, what do I do? I'm in this season, what do I do?"

Muthoni Waigwa:

It's such an important nugget that you've shared there where we need to stop labeling people. You know, "I do this X." Because now so it's not X, they feel so isolated and you know like they can't fit in.

So how are you encouraging your children to be who God created them to be instead of holding onto these labels that society has set out for them?

Lucy Mwakaba:

Wow. So several things. Number one, I believe especially for my first two, because they're girls, they're watching me as their mom. So being the role model that they would want to follow and how am I doing this? There's something I usually or I constantly tell them that, "Learning never stops." So even when I was pursuing my master's, I involved the whole family. So I told them, "Mommy is going to go back to school and this means a bit of sacrifices because you'll not see me." Because the course I was doing was a bit of a crash program that used to happen during the holiday season. So I needed them to understand that, "For the next two years, Mommy is not going to be very present. Why? Because I'll be in school." Just showing them, being the role model to show them that number one, I mean learning never stops.

So even as old, they look at me and they're thinking, "My goodness, were you there when dinosaurs were there or something?" They feel like I'm so old. So just showing them even in my years, I am still pursuing, getting, you know up-skilling myself if I may put it like that as in I'm going back to get more skills where my area of work is concerned.

Number two, I like the fact that I've been watching online as different schools have been having career days. And I am liking what I'm seeing because now they are no longer just calling doctors and engineers and you know pilots and all that. I'm seeing designers being called in the team. I'm seeing people in tourism industry being called. So there's also a discovery in our schools that youth, our children can end up being whoever they want to be. The job market has changed and has transformed immensely to the point where we can no longer just sit back and me as a parent and sit back and say, "You know what? You are going to be a doctor." And "No, no, no, no, no." She already has things that she likes doing. I can already see some of the things that are coming up.

My second-born is very artsy in nature. She's very artistic. So you'll find her seated. She's making beads and she wants to sell them. And you see for me, the work that I have is to encourage her. So that is what we are doing. We are standing and stepping up as parents and saying, let's be the role model that our children want to see.

Number two, we are moving away from the common professions that we are used to and we are saying, "You know what? You can pursue whatever you want to pursue so long as you want to do it."

How else am I encouraging my children to be strong and resilient? Just using teachable moments. You know they come home and they've had a hard day at school, something happened. Just encouraging them to see the bigger picture. In as much as they're still young, just to know that you know what, that is part of life. There are disappointments. There are times when your friend who you thought was your real friend will say something about you that is not kind. So as in just teaching them about the balance where life is concerned.

Muthoni Waigwa:

I like that because life is all about teachable moments, however small, however big. And even if you are teaching that to your children, even us as adults, we can pick something from that. You know we may not know something in this moment and we may be struggling with something but, "What can I learn from this moment? What can I learn and apply so that I can move forward with my life and pick up the pieces?" Because sometimes when we go through challenges, we get so caught up in the fact that maybe we failed or we've fallen down and we decide that that's going to be our state of being.

So how do you navigate your failures or how do you learn from your mistakes? Because honestly for me, just looking at my journey of 10 years in business, one of the things that has kept me going is the understanding that tomorrow is a brand new day. So if today is not going well, tomorrow I can wake up feeling fresh and figure out where I missed the mark and what I can do can to make it better or to improve on something.

Lucy Mwakaba:

So how do I navigate failure? I have learned that failure is not fatal. Failure is not fatal in as much as the society has put us in a place where we, all we talk about are our successes. We never talk about our failures. Really failure is not fatal. The truth is all of us have failed in one way or another. And if you are honest enough, we'll say we have failed more than we have succeeded.

So how do I navigate that? I'm okay, number one, with failing. Okay, I'm okay with it. And one of the things that I keep on having to remind myself is to have this conversation with my children that even when we go for their, what is it called? Their teacher, parent meeting. Even when they've not done, you know they've not had stellar results I'm like, "You know what? You did your best. Did you do your best?" And they're able to say that, "Yes, I did my best or I didn't do my best. I did not study and all that." So just to have that conversation so that my children can also understand that it's okay to fail.

Now after doing that, what is important is what do I do after failing? What do I do? Do I sit there and wallow in my failure or do I get up back again? So for me, I give myself space. I allow myself space to just you know think. You know sometimes if I'm able to go somewhere and sit and think about it or even have a conversation with someone who's very close to me about my failure, and what I think I did not do or what I think I thought I was supposed to do and I was not able to do. So just having a candid conversation with someone who's close to me and I'm able to open up also helps to bring things into perspective.

And then also being plugged in with business people has also helped a lot. Being in forums where there are other business people has also helped a lot in the sense that as people talk about their challenges, then you realize you're not on your own. You realize that it's not unique. It's not that I am the only one who has missed a mark. So being in a forum of like-minded people. I'm in a forum where it's a women-only business. I'm in a forum where there are several business people from different walks of life. So being in such forums has helped a lot.

This year I also engaged a business coach. So we've had preliminary talks. We are yet to engage completely, but even through the preliminary talks, as able to gather and you know the business coach began by telling the story of his life. And then you realize, "You know what I mean? We are in the same boat, as in we have all gone through things that we thought could sink us completely. And yet it was the moment where we were propelled to where we are."

Muthoni Waigwa:

That is so powerful. Thank you so much for sharing that, Lucy. So I really like what you've mentioned about you know, failure is not fatal. And sometimes we feel like because we are failing, our lives are over, over, over. And as you said, "It's a moment where when you reflect, it can be a point of propelling you even further and forward into your career or your business endeavors."

So with that in mind, what are you learning about yourself? You know with all the challenges that you've overcome, the lessons that you're imparting to your children, what are you learning about yourself?

Lucy Mwakaba:

That I'm strong when I rely on God. So for me, my faith is very important. So my total reliance on God is very important. I also learn a lot from, I think I picked a lot from my parents growing up, just watching them and seeing how they dealt with challenges. Of course, when I was younger I didn't understand it, but as I grew older and when I even got my own home, I discovered they shielded us from a lot of things. As in to the point where there are times I would call home and ask, "How are you able to do this? How are you able to raise us and make us feel as if we were in a very wealthy home and yet we were not necessarily." But yeah, learning a lot from my parents as well.

And I've also learned that life is life. Life is life. This path that I'm on is my unique path. I will have ups, I will have downs, and that's okay. This journey of the ups and downs, the mountains and the hills actually helps me to grow as a person, helps me to grow in business, as a wife, as a mother, as a sister, as a friend, whatever title I hold at a particular time. It's the journey that I've gone through that has helped me to be able to become who I am to be.

Muthoni Waigwa:

I like that phrase. Life is life and sometimes life can really life away and you have no idea.

Lucy Mwakaba:

Yeah.

Muthoni Waigwa:

Well, thank you for sharing that. What are your future aspirations? Hopes you have The Lead Child. I see you are a personal coach. I see you are leader in your different spheres of influence. What are your future aspirations or hopes?

Lucy Mwakaba:

So I have very big dreams, yeah. I am one girl who has very big dreams. So I would like to further my education. My children say Dr. Mimo sounds very nice so-

Muthoni Waigwa:

Oh, wow.

Lucy Mwakaba:

I know how heavy it is to pursue a PhD. One, because I've been in a space where people are doing so and I've seen how the journey is. It's not an easy journey, but it doesn't mean it's not doable. So I'm looking forward to doing that. Not this year. I just graduated with my master's last year. So I'm giving myself this year as a break and maybe some part of next year, and then I can enroll.

Where The Lead Child is concerned I would like us to be the brand that is known and trusted when it comes to training both kids and adults in soft skills and matters parenting, that will become a voice in this generation.

And finally, my ultimate, ultimate is where our education is concerned as a country I would like... During my time pursuing my master's, which I did in Strathmore University, we had an opportunity to travel out of the country. We went to Finland just to visit that country, being one of the countries with the best education system. And one of the things that we got from there is that education for them is an equalizer. So there's nothing like privatization of education like has happened here in Kenya. And I love that, that education is an equalizer. It puts everyone on the same pedestal. So my ultimate is that our education system will actually be transformed to be an equalizer as opposed to becoming a dividing force. That irrespective of where a child goes to school, they'll be able to have an equal platform, a level playing field in life to be able to be who God has desired for them to be. Yeah.

Muthoni Waigwa:

It's so interesting how you've said that education should be an equalizer. And it's so unfortunate, like you can see across Africa that the educational system has leaps and bounds to grow. And I just truly wish you all the best you know in creating or whatever you do in this space to improve the educational system because it's important that each of us, wherever we go to school, wherever we go to further our studies, that we are all placed on the same level playing field. Because ultimately we're here to truly serve our purposes and to be an impact for our generations.

So your bio, I just want to read one line and then you can build up on it. "Your belief is that the world becomes a better place when we live our lives selflessly and with an attitude of servanthood towards our fellow man." Tell us more.

Lucy Mwakaba:

I totally believe that we are not put here on earth just to serve ourselves. I believe that the reason why we are here is not just to become better as individuals, but our purpose is to make the community where we live a better place. So my desire in whatever I do, be it The Lead Child, be it the coaching services that I give, that I will make a difference. And that's why even in my tagline I say "transforming generations one child at a time." Because some of my programs actually engage just, you know it's individual basis. But I look at it that there's going to be a ripple effect. If I transform one child and that child is able to transform another. If I transform a parent, if I transform an institution as in I've trained an institution about becoming better and how to engage with children, that institution is transforming the children and the children will, as in you see the ripple effect.

So for me, it is transforming the society where I'm in, not just for myself. So my journey, I feel like my journey is unique to who I am so that I can actually transform the community that I'm in.

Muthoni Waigwa:

I wish you all the best and you shall do so. And with that, what is your parting shot?

Lucy Mwakaba:

I am grateful. I'm grateful for the path that my life has taken. Now I have to be honest with you that this has not always been the case. I've had my moments of doubt and sometimes I still do, but you know where I wonder if maybe I'd taken a mainstream career, like for example, I'm a teacher by education. Sorry, by training. I'm a teacher by training.

Would my life have been easier if I had just taken the mainstream career? I don't know. But slowly and slowly, opportunity after opportunity, I'm appreciating this path. I've realized that I don't have to have all the answers at all the time. There are times I am clueless of what I'm doing, but that is okay. So my journey is unique. It has helped me to stretch. It has helped me to think beyond what I thought possible.

So my encouragement and my parting shot to be appreciate your journey, learn and grow from it. God has a reason why you are where you are. Whatever season you're in, draw strength from the people who love you, your support system, and do not do the journey of life alone because you need people. Thank you.

Muthoni Waigwa:

And with that, Lucy, I wish you all the best. And to everyone who's listening, failure is not fatal. Your journey is unique, and learn and grow from it.

I invite you to carry the lessons learned in this podcast into your own lives, embracing your inner strength and nurturing resilience in the face of adversity. Let's forge a future where we support one another and celebrate the triumphs shaping our journeys.

Thank you for listening and stay tuned for more inspiring episodes that will continue to ignite the flame of strength and resilience within you. Until next time, I'm your host, Muthoni Waigwa bidding you farewell, but not goodbye.